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  • This topic has 7 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 1 day ago by Profile PhotoChavy.
  • Viewing 8 posts - 1 through 8 (of 8 total)
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    Hope
    Participant

    How do I not make myself be emotionally dependent to therapy and my therapist? I feel very attached and dependent to my therapist. When we can’t meet one week, it’s like the end of the world for me and it’s extremely hard for me, but I don’t want it to be like that. It feels like I can’t live without my therapist. I want to be able to be ok when we can’t meet sometimes and not feel so attached to her. I want to be able to be ok on my own but still knowing that she’s there for me. How do I do this?

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    Chavy
    Participant

    @Hope, I have the same issue!!

    It’s so hard! I wish my mother is a “real” mother and that I wouldn’t feel so emotionally needy with my therapist.
    For me, I think it has to do with attachment trauma, so I’m trying to work on telling myself that I don’t need her as much as I believe I do. Meaning, I need her in the sense of having therapy, and I’m working on not needing her in the sense of in between sessions.

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    Chavy
    Participant

    I really hope more people chime in here because this is not spoken about enough and is clearly a challenge for many of us.

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    melissa
    Participant

    I wish I’d have advice, and some kind of solution for all of us struggling with this. I think it’s just a phase (a long, hellish phase) that we have to go through in order to heal.

    I have times when I decide enough is enough and that “I won’t let her mean so much to me,” but that means I shut her out altogether, which is horrible in its own way.

    It sucks. It really does. It is so painful to so desperately need someone who can’t really be there for you in “real life.” I, too, find therapy so impossibly painful, and the most hardest part is the relationship with my therapist. The push and pull. The desperately needing her, but desperately not wanting to need her.

    Talking about it is always a good idea, though I’m at a point where I’m not even interesting in hashing out the same thing again. So no real advice, only hugs.

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    Hope
    Participant
    Topic Author

    I’m glad I’m not the only one that feels like this. It really helps to know others struggle with the same thing. Thank you for sharing.


    @melissa
    I do the same thing where I tell myself enough and I don’t need her but then shut her out all together.

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    Hope
    Participant
    Topic Author

    Thank you Michali and Fay!!

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    Chavy
    Participant

    In response to Hope's post #14651:

    @hope, exactly! I really thought I was probably the only one dealing with it.

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