- Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)
danielb718Participant10 months ago
Hi I have a question How can I deal with my negative thoughts I look at people and the world around me very negative and dark any advice? Also what books would be a good idea to read?
ChavyParticipant10 months ago
Wow, I so relate to that question! I feel that it depends on my mood. If I’m in a good mood, I’ll let negative events fly by, and if I’m in a bad mood, it’s much, much harder. I basically get stuck in it too! I would say to maybe try and find different outlets, things / hobbies that you enjoy doing and those good feelings with hopefully spill over to other areas and create good feelings.
Another point would be to explore the thinking traps like all-or-nothing thinking and catastrophizing. For example, if a friend didn’t return my call or text messages after numerous attempts, I will probably feel dismissed and rejected and angry! But if I really tap into the thinking traps, I could ask myself what are other reasons for this person’s non-communicative stance. I myself really struggle with this, so I honestly don’t have an answer, but I hope this give you some insight!
I don’t really know of any books….
RebYidParticipant10 months ago
Hey, So I also struggled with that for most of my life.
I’m no professional, but I can share my own personal journey towards seeing the world and others in a different light. I was also very “judgee” and not until I got to a point (in my mid 30’s) where I finally went to see a therapist (about other stuff going on in my life) did I begin to understand just how fragile and fragmented I was… bringing up and out all the pain I had been living with and understanding where and how it connected to so many of my decisions and behaviors through life really gave me a new perspective on humanity as a whole. It was downright liberating to realize that the people around me probably had there own stories as well, which in turn affected their behaviors. I look at people I once wrote off as bad or rude, and now I see them as pained and hurt instead. If you knew who I was you never believe that I had a “story”… we all have our “story”, some stories are just louder then others.
B”h, I am at a point in my life where I am not just thankful for that realization, but I see how my issues shaped me and helped me to understand others. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I would repeat the intense pain and suffering I went through to have the compassion and love for another human being any day.
So while I don’t disagree with anything Chavy said, I think looking inward for a deeper self understanding will help your perspective outward. Trust me, its so much easier to start with having compassion towards yourself!
Wishing you best of luck on your journey!
nancygg1Participant10 months ago
I want to recommend the book Mind Power by James Borg. I’m reading it for the second time already and I can honestly say that this book has changed my life!