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    Dr. Joanne Royer
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    After a few decades under your belt, what has been your greatest challenge looking back from this vantage point?

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    d.f.
    Participant

    Like this question! For me – it has been choosing to separate and differentiate from my family of origin by getting married. I’m glad I did but the process and journey was a long one. I guess the greatest challenge was emotionally staying connected although being less physically present. Also, learning to be there for loved ones while making room for new loved ones and important relationships in my life. Still learning to balance this… Curious to hear if others have this struggle as well.

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    Chany
    Participant

    leanring to be part of 3 families. Family of origin, in law family, and my own.

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    Dr. Joanne Royer
    Participant
    Topic Author

    @d.f. and @ chany. Thank you for sharing your journey. Midlife brings so much change and whether launching children out of the house into college or taking inventory on “what now”, perhaps things that have escaped your self-expectations, it all comes down to now deciding on looking on the beliefs we have brought with us up to this point and whether or not we want to tweak them, delete them, or own them. The great thing is we get to make that choice for what is best for us and individuals! @Chany and to balance 3 families each with different thoughts and feelings – good for you for showing up in all 3 of them~ easier said than done. @d.f., being emotionally present while being less physically present can be a challenge but sounds as though you are committed to that goal. Its always helpful I to take a minute and tune into what your thoughts are when emotions start to speak to you.

    great conversation, thank you!

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    Dr. Joanne Royer
    Participant
    Topic Author

    now that we are “here” in midlife, what did any of you bring from mistakes, poor choices, or would of should have could have thoughts that you can create gifts out of moving forward?

    For me, I wrote a letter to myself 3 years out talking to myself of today. This was a few years back and WOW. it was powerful and helped to see what the past has been able to gift me as I remain future focused.

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    d.f.
    Participant

    now that we are “here” in midlife, what did any of you bring from mistakes, poor choices, or would of should have could have thoughts that you can create gifts out of moving forward? For me, I wrote a letter to myself 3 years out talking to myself of today. This was a few years back and WOW. it was powerful and helped to see what the past has been able to gift me as I remain future focused.

    Interesting! can you explain more of this process i would like to try it? Is it similar to a 5 year plan?

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    Dr. Joanne Royer
    Participant
    Topic Author

    @d.f.  You are here today. Now write to the “you” today as though it was 3 years that transpired (make it a year if you’d like), I found there is more room to “envision, to play, to set the intention” with 3 years. You are 3 years ahead writing to your Self of today, where you are living, what changes you have made, comment on the journey getting to those changes and having them actually happen, who is in your life, etc. hope that makes sense. Try it and share if you’d like your experience.!

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    d.f.
    Participant

    Just did this. Was difficult to wrap my head around but powerful and empowering. Thank you so much.

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    Dr. Joanne Royer
    Participant
    Topic Author

    @d.f.  AWESOME that you gave it a go! I’m so glad you had that experience. Thx for letting me know.

     

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