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    avacad0
    Participant

    I have always had this deep feelings of sadness and feeling bad about myself. It took years for me to identify it as Depression. Here’s my question: “now as a grown adult in my 30’s who has been like this since my teenage years is it really possible to be fully happy? Can I really conquer this beast called anxiety and depression?” On my part I’m doing what needs to be done, but living like this for years can I truly crawl out of these sad emotions?

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    d.f.
    Participant

    hey avocado I believe that there is hope. i know and firmly believe that people can change at any state if they are motivated enough. Check out the resources for depression I believe there was someone who posted a while back about a book that helped.

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    orphaned
    Participant

    My favorite motto is “where there’s life, there’s hope.” I think it’s really true if you want to change it’s never too late. It’s hard, very hard but possible.

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    Chany
    Participant

    My favorite motto is “where there’s life, there’s hope.” I think it’s really true if you want to change it’s never too late. It’s hard, very hard but possible.

     

    like this and so agree

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    Wandering Jew
    Participant

    Hi!

    I too have been there, and my personal experience has told me that all the emotions speak to us, and are trying to tell us something.

    Exploration of emotions in therapy with IFS or EFT were very helpful to me.

    Best of Luck!

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    Chany
    Participant

    Hey! Can you explain what’s IFS?

     

     

     

     

     

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    Wandering Jew
    Participant

    Sure!

    IFS is a new-ish modality of therapy that claims to treat everything from trauma to anxiety.

    Enclosed are links to websites that explain a little about it.

    https://www.goodtherapy.org/learn-about-therapy/types/internal-family-systems-therapy#Issues%20Treated%20with%20IFS

    Disclaimer: As I am not a mental health professional, I cannot give advice or direction; I can only share the knowledge of what I have seen and experienced.

     

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    Chany
    Participant

    Interesting. Thanks for sharing.

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    StayPositive
    Participant

    Hey Avacad0,

    As someone who has suffered from depression most of my life and is in my 30s as well, I can say confidently that there is plenty of hope and opportunity for happiness. I have found therapy and medication to be particularly helpful and I would highly recommend seeing a doctor who can prescribe the best methods of recovery for your personal situation. Acknowledging the depression in yourself is a huge first step and is extremely hard to do, and you should feel proud of that. Living with depression is just awful but when you achieve that happiness you will appreciate it that much more. Best of luck to you!!

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    avacad0
    Participant
    Topic Author

    Thank u everybody for sharing your thoughts and feelings. It’s really validating to know that I’m part of a community that has other’s struggling with depression. Loneliness is a very sad path to walk on. Just the thought of others in the same situation already minimizes the pain a bit!

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    Yitty
    Participant

    Hi avocado. Your choice of a username is very telling. It tells about your belief in yourself as someone rich in nutrients and capable of self healing, as this food is called by many a super food and our body too ,is a super self healing mechanism.

    I too suffered from feelings of worthlessness and depression,and I came to a modality called somatic experiencing that made an amazing impact on my life. The basic premise is to become more and more in touch with your internal sensations,and this awareness helps you discharge the uncomfortable sensations and this is followed by  the discharge of uncomfortable emotions and thoughts that accompany the sensation. Our emotions lie inside our bodies…in a physical way. This has helped me to gain enormous self awareness, and the ability to regulate my emotions ,the ability to live in the present ,  the feeling of being more self contained, the ability to discharge my stresses and traumas. My improved nervous system ,my improved moods,spilled over in better and healed relationships with myself and with everybody around me.

    I was so gratified by all my improvements that I studied to become a somatic healer. I bh see so much healing in all my clients. You can read many books on this subject.some authors are ,Peter levine,Regina Melrose, Pat Ogden, Richie Davidson, Dan Siegel and many others.

    I wish you much much hatzlacha. You are equipped. You have all the strength and nutrients inside of yourself.

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    avacad0
    Participant
    Topic Author

    Amazing! so insightful and clear. In my journey of struggles and healing I learnt never ever to judge people. Not that i don’t ever do that, but I know that everyone has their customized challenges and u really never know what’s doing at their end. At my lowest point I got the most interesting remarks from people. They would make comments to me about how perfect it looks when on the inside I was literally crumbling. I learnt to shift my view from black and white thinking to a little bit of shaded gray….

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    Yitty
    Participant

    I’m so glad that what I wrote resonated with you. Body healing is my passion and if you  want to discuss it more you can email me at Leah.somatichealing@gmail.com

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    0212
    Participant

    Hi Avocad0,

    Depression is a terribly painful disease. When I was in my early 20’s (I’m 31 now) I started the struggle with depression. Your question was one that I contemplated many times over. At one point I was in the hospital for attempted suicide. A few months later I checked into “Four Winds”, a psychiatric facility that offers both inpatient and out-patient options. I did 3 weeks of each and lots of therapy. At a certain point I dumped my psychiatrist and decided that even though I can’t afford $400 per session, I’m going to pay that if it’s the only way out of my hell. The psychiatrist I went to helped tremendously, but at the same time, I know that he’s not for everybody. Somebody I know went to him and left him in the end because the psychiatrist didn’t want to work with him.

    Only once I was feeling better (yes, it took months of therapy and experimenting with different medications) did I realize that I actually have the ability to truly be happy. It was then that I realized how toxic depression is. Depression tried to convince me that there was no hope and boy did the depression succeed. However, Once I was in a good place and I realized that there actually is hope and that depression just loves painting that gloomy cloudy illusion, it helped me somewhat the next time my depression returned.

     

    That’s kind of a long answer, but I really want to make my point clear: 100% YES, there is a happy future out there waiting. As a matter of fact, despite all the hardships that have come into my life as a result of the depression (for example, divorce,) I can confidently say that I have experienced happier times in the months/years after depression than I had experienced before the depression.

     

    In Judaism we believe that there’s a balance to everything. For example, according to the Midrash, Esav was supposed to have 6 tribes & Yaakov 6 tribes. Esav had the potential to be one of the fathers of the Jews. His potential was that great! But look where he ended up: He was a thieving murderous rapist, among so many other evil things. How can that be, that somebody destined for such greatness can fall so low? The answer is, that in order for somebody to reach such heights, they have to have the ability to reach the equivalent in the opposite direction. At one point when I was in-patient at Four Winds, I remember thinking about this concept and it hit me. If I have the ability to be so sad, so depressed, so low, wow, I can’t wait to see what the potential is for my happiness. Anybody who experienced depression knows the feeling that there’s nothing worse than depression in the whole world. So I ended that thought realizing that I can’t even fathom what my potential for happiness is. And I can attest that it’s something that I am 100% in belief of and I’ve seen tremendous happiness in my life.

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    avacad0
    Participant
    Topic Author

    Wow, that was such a powerful response. Thank you so much for sharing. I have a lot to think about…..

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