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    splitandtrying2bme
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    Hi there,

    I haven’t been on here for a while. Missed you all. BH I have been doing very well over the past few months (some ups, and downs and slips but overall good), and suddenly since Friday my anxiety is so high, and I am feeling really depressed.

    It’s kind of terrifying me because I don’t know where this will lead to. After fighting for so long and finally getting to taste some freedom from the depression and debilitating anxiety, I don’t feel like I have the energy to fight it again if this continues. I’m having all these hopeless thoughts return, and I am feeling out of control anxious. I also just made the decision to return to college and now I’m really nervous what will be with it now- if I’m depressed again like this. Because I don’t see how I can do college with this level of anxiety and hopelessness. I was in intensive treatment for my anxiety and depression and finally I was weaning off of my intensive treatment team, and now I’m so afraid of needing more again. I am embarrassed by it all.

    Any advice/ opinions/ validation would be helpful.

    And I want to thank all of you for giving me this safe space to share. It is so so helpful, especially that we can write anything and everything on here.

    Hello and welcome back,

    First off, I just want to say that that is so hard and so scary to be in a place you didn’t think you’d have to be in again, particularly since you’ve tasted that freedom of feeling pretty good in your own skin.

    I’m glad that you feel welcomed and safe to share here because you deserve to have all the support as you navigate this challenge judgement-free.

    I’d recommend speaking to your psychiatrist about this as well as a therapist because they will be able to help you pinpoint why this might be happening that takes into account your history, your personality, and your environment.  I do want to also stress that we are living in incredibly stressful times with lots of significant unknowns that can exacerbate anxiety and depression let alone create anxiety and depression for people who have never even experienced them before.  Add to that other stressors like going to school, and it can make sense why you’d have flare ups.  Learning tools to manage these pieces in therapy can also be incredibly beneficial.

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    splitandtrying2bme
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    Topic Author

    Thank you for your response. Yes I am speaking to them about it. I hope it gets better.

    thanks.

    Hi @split thanks, as always, for speaking up & sharing some of your story.

    While I cannot imagine what you have been experiencing, I do know that the past few months have been an extremely challenging and anxiety-ridden time for many of us. So many people who were doing better or just starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel had setbacks.

    At the same time, many drew strength from the time & effort spent in therapy and in consultation with friends and are “banking” off the skills and ideas they heard previously to get through these times.

    I hope things have been getting better!!

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