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Hi everyone it’s me, Chumi đ
For those of you that don’t follow me (although you should LOL), I was diagnosed with PPD (post partum depression) and GAD (general anxiety disorder) back in 2015. I think. To be honest I know that my feelings started soon after my second son was born in the beginning of 2014 but it took a while until I found a therapist and psychiatrist I could work with. My journey was long and hard and to be honest much of the timeline is a blur. So 2015 is an average.
I started taking medication (lexapro) in the spring/summer of 2016. And it took me 2 years to fully be completely open about my journey. There are still many days when I feel stigmatized, scared, vulnerable, but I try and push through those moments and tell myself it can result in something good. For even one person saving themselves because I was open, it is worth it.
Well anyway, enough blabber, now I am here and open to all questions, everything. Go ahead, I will be back on here on Tuesday from 8-9pm to actively answer every single one of your questions.
(for more of my story you can see the highlights on my instagram page or message me for the link to my youtube video where I tell it all).
C xx
Wow, this is so great. Thank you so much for doing this. I was wondering if you could talk about your support system during the time when you were not open about what you were going through.
In response to Chavy's post #5669:
Hey! where was there a mention of a blog?
In response to RomanticYente's post #5657:
You’re very welcome đ My support system was and is my husband. I got married very young and literally ‘grew up’ with my husband. He is my best friend. He knew that I wasn’t feeling myself, he could tell that how I was behaving and the things I was thinking, were not me.
When I told him that I need help, he came with me and sat outside the Dr office. My family didn’t know my siblings, my inlaws, no one knew except him. I also moved to NY from the UK 6 weeks after my wedding. I did not have many friends here and I had no one to confide in. My British friends didn’t understand what I was going through. Eventually I opened up to my parents and grandparents (when I went home for a visit and they saw my meds) and they became my second support system. My grandmother makes a point to check in with me every week and literally reminds me all the time that I have this.
As you can tell, support systems are vital but you have to build the one you want – so get your husband, sister, mother, whoever it is, you need someone.
Hey! thanks so much for doing this for us. Do you still feel like people look at you as less than since you’ve been open about your struggles? Or not, since your an influencer in some way?
In response to Banana's post #5659:
I was never super private about it but I was also never fully open. The week that Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain committed suicide, I saw everyone posting about them and coming up with elaborate hashtags. I realized that this is my moment, I need to make people see that it isn’t the super wealthy, it isn’t the super poor, its the regulars like me and you who are suffering and we are not insane and we are not crazy we just have an illness. That was my opening and although extremely scary, it was the most rewarding moment on my instagram page ever. I got so much incredible feedback and I realized we need this in the frum community so I just didn’t stop.
In response to Chavy's post #5669:
I don’t have a blog but I have an instagram page which these days people called “insta-blog”.
My grandmother makes a point to check in with me every week and literally reminds me all the time that I have this.
LOL!
So inspiring!! I had a family member who suffered ppd and it was such a taboo topic at that time ..I remember wishing I would understand so I would know how to help her ..but it was so hidden that I just had to pretend instead of offering my help
In response to Chany's post #5690:
LOVE THAT
In response to zissy's post #5691:
Yessss! I think that’s so common like people make believe everything is fine so even though you know something’s up you have to play along and can’t even be supportive because that would be insulting to them
In response to Chany's post #5687:
I get both. To be honest people don’t look at me as “less than” but they look at me as “nebech”. They also think that I am exaggerating. I have received comments from so called friends saying things like “the meds aren’t working why would you take them” or “just relaxed, be happy, and you will feel better”. These comments make my eyes roll because I know deep down that they are just ignorant comments but at the same time they still sting.
On the flip side because I have been so public about it on such a large platform people are amazed by my “strength”. I don’t personally call it strength I believe it is just courage to push past the vulnerability if that makes sense. I sometimes feel that it takes over my page though people meet me and they talk about how much they love how open I am about my struggles but they won’t say anything about the cake I spent 5 hours making or the freezer I successfully stocked LOL. People notice what is important to them so if they comment on the mental health it means I affected them which means I succeeded a little bit and I am proud.
That was my opening and although extremely scary, it was the most rewarding moment on my instagram page ever. I got so much incredible feedback and I realized we need this in the frum community so I just didnât stop.
Did you get any hate from it? Have people ever shamed you?
